One of the absolute best tools that my husband and I have found for our marriage has been identifying and studying each other’s Love Languages. There are endless ways to fill your spouse’s “love tank” once you know how they best receive love- and deployment can be just one more opportunity to get creative!
Here’s what you should consider including in your husband’s care package, based on his Love Language:
His Love Language: Gifts
What he needs: I need to be surprised that you thought about me so deeply.
- Include their favorite of anything (candy, razors, books, deodorant) and mention that you included them because you know it’s a favorite.
- Consider including one really thoughtful (pricier) item over many “generic” products
- Write down any items they mention in conversation- include them in your next care package without telling your spouse they’re on the way.
- Find the bands, films, or actors they like on social media, send them similar albums or DVDs, and tell him about how you chose each one.
His Love Language: Quality Time
What they need: I need to connect with you in a new way.
- Keep a daily journal to him, and send the latest installment in each care package.
- Send a disposable camera and ask him to fill it with pictures of things he is grateful for during deployment. Tell him you’ll listen to stories about his photos when he returns.
- If he can skype, ask your spouse to open their care package while you’re on a call so that you can enjoy it together.
His Love Language: Words of Affirmation
What they need: I need to hear WHY I’m loved.
- Decorate the care package with the “10 things I miss about you” sticker kit from Paper Paisley– fill it with the things you love about him.
- Include a “thank you” card for something he did before leaving for deployment that has helped you out now (thank you for changing the tires on the car- it’s running great!).
- Write the words “I love you” on each of the items in the care package as a reminder.
His Love Language: Acts of Service
What they need: I need us to be a team.
- Keep track of when you last sent essentials, and send replacements before they’ll likely run out so he doesn’t have to ask for new ones.
- Reach out to his friends to see what others in the unit might need and ask him to share with friends (he will LOVE that you are serving his buddies too!)
- Send pre-addressed envelopes & cards for him to send to his loved ones. Bonus points if you find their birthdays and write a note to remind him!
His Love Language: Physical Touch
What: I need to feel your presence.
- Include sensory reminders of home, like his favorite pillowcase or towel.
- Send him a hug by sleeping in his t-shirt and sharing it in his next care package.
- Before you pack-up, your box, spray a quick spritz of your perfume inside! Your signature scent will make him feel like he’s closer to home.
Do you know your own Love Language or your spouse’s? If not, be sure to check out the Love Language quiz, and start filling his love tank- even during deployment!!